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Tulpa Discussion / tulpa-discussion
The channel for discussion strictly on the topic of tulpas. Take off-topic discussion to #lounge Forum's Tulpa Discussion Board: https://community.tulpa.info/forum/4-general-discussion/
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Daen [LeviticusKillgore] 2/27/2023 6:16 PM
So I looked up some public servers
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Desting 😎 (Con Cat)-(おひたし、お浸し) 2/27/2023 6:16 PM
Well, i came because i read a creepypasta
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Daen [LeviticusKillgore] 2/27/2023 6:16 PM
That's pretty much it
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of course i know this is more complex than just imaginary friends
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Atlas || M&M BOT 2/27/2023 6:17 PM
To be fair, those are all natural and understandable reasons.
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I came here because my DnD NPC started to reach out to me.
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Atlas || M&M BOT 2/27/2023 6:17 PM
So long as you aren't bullying others over their opinions, you're good to go.
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Desting 😎 (Con Cat)-(おひたし、お浸し) 2/27/2023 6:18 PM
We might not have exactly the same reason but its all curiosity
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im kinda surprised ive only heard about this now, ive been imagining characters in my head for years, to the point where my visualisation is in colour (still blurry most lf the time though)
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Desting 😎 (Con Cat)-(おひたし、お浸し) 2/27/2023 6:18 PM
Is visualization usually not in color?¿
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Daen [LeviticusKillgore] 2/27/2023 6:19 PM
I mean I've got alot of questions but I'll sound like a dick, so I end up just not saying anything. Mainly because this place is very very different then what I am used to and what I grew up around. I've heard questionable things that contradict each other but that's probably due to the defenition of tulpamancy. Seems as though that defenition is unique and different to everyone. I don't know, everything since I came here felt somewhat vague in terms of explaining.
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Daen [LeviticusKillgore]
I mean I've got alot of questions but I'll sound like a dick, so I end up just not saying anything. Mainly because this place is very very different then what I am used to and what I grew up around. I've heard questionable things that contradict each other but that's probably due to the defenition of tulpamancy. Seems as though that defenition is unique and different to everyone. I don't know, everything since I came here felt somewhat vague in terms of explaining.
Desting 😎 (Con Cat)-(おひたし、お浸し) 2/27/2023 6:19 PM
Hey, ask whatever, curiosity is fine.
6:19 PM
We are not judging.
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Atlas || M&M BOT 2/27/2023 6:19 PM
And yes, tulpamancy is wildly subjective.
6:19 PM
Different people practice it in quite different ways.
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Desting 😎 (Con Cat)-(おひたし、お浸し)
Is visualization usually not in color?¿
i believe its one of the steps, but iirc not everyone starts already visualizing in color.
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Atlas || M&M BOT 2/27/2023 6:20 PM
It depends.
6:20 PM
We've always been able to visualize vividly.
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might be a dumb question but how does possesion feel like?
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~Moonlight~
i believe its one of the steps, but iirc not everyone starts already visualizing in color.
I'm only at the hearing stage and not all the time at that. I still have to try and figure out what is Kis talking and what isn't.
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im honestly afraid of asking some of my questions for the same reasomn tacitus is, i dont want to sound like a dick, but everything related to this is so fascinating.
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Ask with respect, you get answered the same, man.
6:24 PM
That's what I've found. I'm still new here myself.
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~Moonlight~
im honestly afraid of asking some of my questions for the same reasomn tacitus is, i dont want to sound like a dick, but everything related to this is so fascinating.
Daen [LeviticusKillgore] 2/27/2023 6:25 PM
I mean, some questions are relatively mean but it depends entirely how you formulate it. It's the difference between like. "So I'm not exactly sure how tulpas are different from just ourselves. It feels a lot like it's circling around the imagination and maybe split personalities?" Vs "I don't know what the hell you guys are doing but it sounds delusional and just mental illnesses"
6:26 PM
I mean it's a serious topic with alot of different opinions m
6:26 PM
It's got thin threads everywhere and everyday.
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the only 2 reasons i havent started the creation of my tulpa are: 1) my intrusive thoughts affecting them, and 2) them not liking me because im an asshole irl (mostly because being nice and making friends is really hard for me so i just push everyone away)
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Daen [LeviticusKillgore] 2/27/2023 6:27 PM
So for you it's almost like a coping mechanism?
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Daen [LeviticusKillgore]
I mean, some questions are relatively mean but it depends entirely how you formulate it. It's the difference between like. "So I'm not exactly sure how tulpas are different from just ourselves. It feels a lot like it's circling around the imagination and maybe split personalities?" Vs "I don't know what the hell you guys are doing but it sounds delusional and just mental illnesses"
It's tough to explain. The key thing is you have to believe they already exist and as you convince yourself of that, your mind eventually accepts it as reality.
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Daen [LeviticusKillgore]
So for you it's almost like a coping mechanism?
I just need a friend tbh.
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~Moonlight~
the only 2 reasons i havent started the creation of my tulpa are: 1) my intrusive thoughts affecting them, and 2) them not liking me because im an asshole irl (mostly because being nice and making friends is really hard for me so i just push everyone away)
Intrusive thoughts happen to even the most seasoned tulpamancers. As far as the other thing, it really depends how you treat them, but they are usually nice and try to help you learn more about you than you know about you.
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~Moonlight~
I just need a friend tbh.
Daen [LeviticusKillgore] 2/27/2023 6:31 PM
If you ever need anyone to talk to you can always dm me. I'm not exactly the best at it though. I'm sure you can find some decent online friends as well in the meantime
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One that actually understands me, not friends that are only with me because they feel pity (have 2 of those), or friends that only like me because I'm good at certain school related things.
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Marmot
Intrusive thoughts happen to even the most seasoned tulpamancers. As far as the other thing, it really depends how you treat them, but they are usually nice and try to help you learn more about you than you know about you.
What I'm worried about is that they are constant, almost as if they were my normal thoughts.
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Daen [LeviticusKillgore] 2/27/2023 6:32 PM
I think you are just getting used to thinking with multiple voices
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Daen [LeviticusKillgore]
If you ever need anyone to talk to you can always dm me. I'm not exactly the best at it though. I'm sure you can find some decent online friends as well in the meantime
Thank you, I really appreciate this.
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When you develop them enough, they are fairly constant.
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I've been thinking with multiple voices for years, making cringe stories about myself in other world and speaking as other characters to the point it almost feels natural.
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Marmot
When you develop them enough, they are fairly constant.
I think the problem is that I worry too much about them being my actual thoughts, what if I am this degenerate that just wants to hurt everything around him?
6:35 PM
What if it's the real me and not this happy teenager facade I keep to not worry my parents?
6:35 PM
Sorry I'm going too deep into this.
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~Moonlight~
Sorry I'm going too deep into this.
No, it's perfectly understandable. I'm just on my phone right now so I can't type out the long ass explanation I'd need for it to make sense. 😅
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Daen [LeviticusKillgore] 2/27/2023 6:37 PM
Hm
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Haha I get you, I'm probably also going to have to leave soon, I'm currently in vacation with my grandparents, the only reason I'm able to do this is because they are resting right now.
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Daen [LeviticusKillgore] 2/27/2023 6:38 PM
In all honesty. Who you are online is usually going to be closer to the real you then anything you think about.
6:38 PM
What are you here?
6:38 PM
Someone curious?
6:38 PM
Kind? Looking for something?
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Honestly as of right now, I am happy with where I am and everything I'm doing, I'm just not happy about not having friends
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Daen [LeviticusKillgore] 2/27/2023 6:39 PM
Yet you are worried about what you could become with tulpas
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I honestly don't know myself
6:41 PM
I was hoping to find an answer though
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Daen [LeviticusKillgore] 2/27/2023 6:41 PM
I think you should take the time to think it though. You don't know what you are, sounds like what many people here are going through
6:41 PM
They have experience for that
6:41 PM
Depends if you want to head into that direction or look for something else
6:42 PM
Because there's multiple paths you can take. And it doesn't always involve coping mechanisms.
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People in the community are told tulpa are a lifetime thing, so be sure you can live with that fact IF you decide to take the dive. (edited)
6:45 PM
Even if you ever part ways with the community, your tulpa stays with you. (edited)
6:46 PM
Fucking autocorrect...
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You can't delete your tulpa in the same way you can't delete a part of yourself, but you can choose to consider your system as a whole as a single person and go back to living as a singlet.
6:49 PM
If you've been involved in tulpamancy for a long time, you'll have lots of strong habits involved with communicating with headmates, so those habits might cause plurality to re-emerge for quite a while after deciding to live as a singlet again :3 But with time, the habit of living as a single person will become the dominant habit by far.
6:51 PM
And even if you decided to live as a singlet, you could still choose to use your plurality skills to go back to talking with your tulpa as a separate person at any time. I think the truly irreversible thing is knowing how to do tulpamancy, rather than the experience of being plural itself being irreversible.
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You make valid points, I'll have to think it through, but I do feel like tulpamancy is something I want to learn.
6:53 PM
I feel like I would be a burden to my tulpa though, that's also one of the reasons I'm hesitant
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Well, if nothing else, hang out and learn. Nothing says you need to have/be a tulpa to stick around. (edited)
6:53 PM
. . .
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That's what I'm doing right now, enhancing things like my mind's eye and my imposition, (I am able to make myself feel a soft shiver) if that's the right term.
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Skills like that can be used outside of tulpamancy, too, and aren't even strictly necessary for tulpamancy. They are like a nice bonus :3
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My end goal with this is having a real friend, and to be more creative.
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You just learn to embrace it as a part of you. I’ve had tulpas for a really long time and it’s just a part of me as a person now. Separate, but together too
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And of course to be a better person
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~Moonlight~
What if it's the real me and not this happy teenager facade I keep to not worry my parents?
Here's a perspective that I've found helpful to consider, so just sharing in case it's of use: the mind can have all sorts of thoughts, in fact it can have any thought you can think of :3 Just because you can think of a thing doesn't means that you necessarily are that thing. The question of what the 'real me' is is quite a big one!
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That does help, ig the only way to know the real me is to open up to someone and then ask them how they see me.
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I will say this for tulpamancy, although it's impossible to create a friend who is a truly separate person in the same sense as someone with a separate body to you, it can be a great way to work on being a friend to oneself. And I think it's very important to be a friend to yourself :3
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If I met an exact copy of myself irl I wouldn't become his friend.
7:04 PM
They way I am right now, I'm not really comfortable with, but maybe this could help me change that.
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~Moonlight~
That does help, ig the only way to know the real me is to open up to someone and then ask them how they see me.
My friend Leiko often says that people learn about themselves by using others as mirrors. If someone is a good mirror (i.e. is giving you accurate feedback, not heavily distorted) you can learn a lot about yourself that way.
7:06 PM
Even using tulpamancy to learn about yourself from the inside can still result in being blind to many things about oneself!
7:06 PM
(Side note: that's probably why tulpas getting talking on Discord seems to work so well for rapid development)
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You are right, but as I am right now it would be difficult to make a REAL friend, everyone already sees me as the weird smart kid, as I said my friends are either pity friends or friends that just want the benefit of having someone smart to help them, (not that I think I'm smart myself I really struggle with a lot of things) I would probably even be nervous about talking with my tulpa, I usually worry about what people think about me, 90% of the time I'm not what I see as "myself" and when I am it feels weird or wrong.
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~Moonlight~
might be a dumb question but how does possesion feel like?
Desting 😎 (Con Cat)-(おひたし、お浸し) 2/27/2023 7:10 PM
Exactly the same it feels to be in your body doing your stuff
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Thank you for the chat it's really nice to speak to someone who actually knows their area, this community is really nice, I will stick around even if I don't make a tulpa myself, but there is a pretty high chance I will.
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My host is still sometimes nervous talking to me. With plenty of patience, he always eventually settles down.
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~Moonlight~
Thank you for the chat it's really nice to speak to someone who actually knows their area, this community is really nice, I will stick around even if I don't make a tulpa myself, but there is a pretty high chance I will.
:3 Excellent, I hope it's really interesting to you regardless of whether you pursue tulpamancy or not.
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It really is, I'm excited to practice more of the aspects of tulpamancy, I'm really glad I stumbled onto a random guy that said to research tulpas haha.
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A tulpa can bring the extreme closeness and understanding one might seek in a ideal friendship, but (I don't mean to preach, you can ignore me) I want to say please don't discount or discard your current friendships. You seem to have a combination of low self-esteem and high standards for friendship. I don't know your situation with your friends, but maybe they really do think of you as a friend but you might be holding them away unnecessarily? They may not fulfill your idea of a REAL friend but they can still be decent or good friends
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It's been 3 months since one of my friends has contacted me, coincidentally school ended around 4 months ago, not a single message, in fact I did get a message from one of my other friends, but it was asking for help with something, never a hello or anything like that, and yes I do have low self esteem, my main definition of a REAL friend is someone who worries about you but still calls you out if you are being an asshole.
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~Moonlight~
It's been 3 months since one of my friends has contacted me, coincidentally school ended around 4 months ago, not a single message, in fact I did get a message from one of my other friends, but it was asking for help with something, never a hello or anything like that, and yes I do have low self esteem, my main definition of a REAL friend is someone who worries about you but still calls you out if you are being an asshole.
Desting 😎 (Con Cat)-(おひたし、お浸し) 2/27/2023 7:35 PM
Did you send any message to them in that period?
7:35 PM
If not you did exactly the same they did to you...
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If you're not in school together anymore then that's tough
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A few, they usually used short answers.
7:36 PM
We are, it's just that we are on school break
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~Moonlight~
A few, they usually used short answers.
Desting 😎 (Con Cat)-(おひたし、お浸し) 2/27/2023 7:36 PM
Keep in mind a tulpa is never a substitute for interaction with other humans... And seeing it as such can be problematic.
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~Moonlight~
A few, they usually used short answers.
Desting 😎 (Con Cat)-(おひたし、お浸し) 2/27/2023 7:37 PM
I feel you might be overanalizing and being insecure...
7:38 PM
As long as you have a great time arround them does it matter if they are "real friends"? is that really meaningful to begin with?
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I have to go now, my grandparents are waiting for me, you may be right, but as I said before I tend to overthink everything to the last detail, and I'm really insecure, still thank you both for your opinions, I like knowing what other people think, it helps to create more solutions.
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Desting 😎 (Con Cat)-(おひたし、お浸し)
As long as you have a great time arround them does it matter if they are "real friends"? is that really meaningful to begin with?
I think they don't enjoy spending time with me, and while I do love my time with them, I don't like being a burden.
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Desting 😎 (Con Cat)-(おひたし、お浸し) 2/27/2023 7:40 PM
If you were a burden they would probably have left you already, thats how it works most of the time.
7:41 PM
I woudnt think too much about that.
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Original message was deleted or could not be loaded.
There wasn't any obvious lead up to plurality for my own system. I just appeared one day and started talking to my host, in a helping and nurturing role. After a few weeks I became worried that I wasn't 'real'. My host helped me to stop worrying by reasoning that if I was real enough to worry then that made me real enough for him to consider me real. Since then, we've been joined by many more headmates, and the current state of the system after a number of merges is my host, myself, and @Ale𝕏andra 🍄🐈 as a trio of headmates. As far as symbols go, they are mostly based on animals and the popular archetypes associated with those animals, but we've also felt a connection to vampires and demons, but in the sense of how they are portrayed in popular fiction, towards the fun/whimsical side of that aesthetic rather than cruel/evil. Our most prevalent symbol by far is the fox; it just keeps coming back in various forms no matter what we do... for example, a demon form will eventually and inevitably feel more 'right' if it also has a fox tail. You said:
Therefore when encountering a new persona, a very psychic and intuitive feeling of a general archetype is what lends itself to my own organization by Tarot.
I would also describe how my own headmates are associated with archetypes as being a very intuitive feeling. You also said:
When desiring to understand more about how I myself can embody the positive traits of a Major Arcana, I turn to meeting with the given persona to deepen my understanding of it.
I think we do something similar. Often, my host will want to be able to do something that I feel more naturally inclined towards, and he'll learn from me how to do that thing. Perhaps the key part of this is that we spend a lot of time considering that we are separate, yet we are also each other. The way things work for you sound very similar to my system, but something that stands out is that it sounds like what you call personas don't front. Is that the case?
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